To have friends, be one. Before it’s too late.
Always remember this:
If you don’t attend the funerals of your friends, they will certainly not attend yours.
–H.L. Mencken
Lying is the toughest part of being a salesman
Lying is the toughest part of being a salesman. No, not me lying, but people like you assuming that I–the salesperson–am lying. Expecting the worst of salespeople seems to bring out the worst in prospects.
Years ago, I heard that one of my clients had been put in charge of a major new project. Expecting more business, I went to his office and said, “Congratulations on getting Project X.”
He looked me in the eye–looked me in the eye!–and said, “That’s not my project.”
“Who’s got it?” I asked.
“It hasn’t been approved,” he said.
I was in a meeting a few days later where he reported on (more…)
Speech Acts
…in the field of philosophy at the beginning of the 20th century, there was an enormous revolution. It was called the linguistic revolution, and it was the time when the understanding of language was fundamentally questioned.
Language went from simply being a shared “code” to describe reality to being a force that actually generates or creates reality. How I use offers and promises and requests and tell my “story” actually generates what is possible for me in action. And another part of the revolution was that language was now seen as action, not just words relating to action, but action itself.
When we speak, we act.
–Julio Olalla
Newfield Network
The test of a first-rate intelligence
The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function. One should, for example, be able to see that things are hopeless and yet be determined to make them otherwise.
–F. Scott Fitzgerald
author of Great Gatsby
Ellen Foster by Kaye Gibbons
My mother, my wife, my sister, and Oprah recommended Ellen Foster to me. Ellen Foster is a very young, very mistreated Southern girl who tells her story in simple, compelling language. She takes us energetically into her world and lets us see adult behavior through her worldly but never cynical eyes. Her saga is funny, clever, and heart-rending. But most of all, it is a true human experience.
I read Ellen Foster in between reading (more…)
Trim Your Sails
The pessimist complains about the wind.
The optimist expects it to change.
The realist adjusts the sails.
–Author Unknown
If you know the source,
please add a comment.
Dramatic increase in productive communication
Vice President Chuck Wiese wrote a generous letter endorsing my group facilitation and executive coaching skills.
The result was a dramatic increase in productive communication, team work, and cooperative action.
I have been involved in various other corporate interventions of varying success. Tony made more progress with [us] in a few weeks than I have experienced before or since.
See Mr. Wiese’s complete reference letter here.
Always Learning
Years ago, an experienced coach and mentor began our meeting by asking about my first child. Just 18 months old, he was eagerly crawling and using a few words.
“It’s a fascinating time,” I replied. “You can almost hear the wheels turning in his head as he experiments to find out what combination of noises and movements is going to get him what he wants.”
I heard myself and paused to absorb the insight.
“Wow!,” I continued. “That is still how I spend most of my day.”
But not every day. How often do you actually examine how well your “noises and movements” are serving you? Don’t we all expend a lot of energy just repeating tired and familiar strategies rather than observing our results and experimenting with new communications?
It is rare to be as eager and innovative as a baby yet how can we fail to be impressed with the child’s rapid progress? Experimenting, responding, growing, moving forward, relentlessly alive–children know how to learn.
How do you stay green and growing? One reliable technique for enhancing our learning, of course, is to work with a supportive and insightful executive coach and surround yourself with people who share your commitment to conscious development.
Aim High …and be Prepared to Work
If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them.
— Henry David Thoreau
Walden, Chapter 18
Creativity and genius are two different things. Ordinary talent growths from earth towards the sky. But genius lives in the sky and tries to reach the earth from there.
Loving Life
Living is loving to live,
Loving the life that you live.
Living is more than
a plan to survive.
The man who is living,
is more than alive.
–Robin Field
in his Oratorio
Reason in Rhyme
(formerly titled Three Questions)
Gifted Group Leader
As CEO of a publicly held company, and as a psychiatrist who is a member of his Vistage group, I hold Tony in the highest regard regarding his talents as a group leader. His intellect, background, and experience keenly enhance the group experience, but more than that he has established a deep feeling of commitment and trust among our group members, which is rare.
Tony is truly gifted as a group leader.
–Dr. Bruce Kehr
Informedix
Path to Regret
A life absent of boldness is a sure path to regret.
Intimacy occurs when we share with another the conversations we normally have only with ourselves.
— Julio Olalla
Newfield Network
When the Sons of Heaven Meet the Daughters of the Earth
I am pleased if a novel provides me with insight into one type of person. I am thrilled that When the Sons of Heaven Meet the Daughters of the Earth by Fernanda Eberstadt took me deeply into the heads of three people: Alfred, the man who married so much money he never learned what he might have made of himself; Dolly, the heiress who loved the art milieu more than she cared about art; and Isaac, the brilliant artist whose personality and creations forced their compromises to the breaking point.
The book introduces us to a wide cast of realistically drawn characters who interact in a believable and compelling manner while moving in (more…)
40% of FTSE Chief Executives Have Used A Personal Coach: The Economist
It is extraordinary to think you can be excellent at something without a coach. The notion that Roger Federer would not have several coaches is ridiculous.
One of the best things that happened to me was to get a coach.
Have Some Happy
Most of my CEO executive coaching clients have detailed, measurable goals. We use them as navigational aids, comparing interim results with plans and expectations, to help the client make adjustments to their attitudes and activity. I was in the midst of one such review when the client took the conversation in a novel and fruitful direction.
I asked, “Have you looked into that club for sharing exotic sports cars we discussed?”
“I’ve been thinking about that, ” he responded. “Why (more…)
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