Many of my clients have noticed that among the many thoughts intruding upon their meditation are some that appear to be genuinely useful ideas and plans. My suggestion is to treat these like any other ideas that arise and use the opportunity to direct your attention back to the chosen focus of your meditation practice, trusting that ideas are plentiful and over time you will be more prosperous operating with a clear mind day-to-day than by grasping at insights and making plans during the short periods you promised yourself to meditate.
And if your mind is dominated by the idea, feel free to pause to take a note or move into execution. Don’t be a victim of your meditation.
Executives often find themselves assigning blame. Many believe that ranking and sorting their colleagues is a key management skill–and I agree. A much rarer and more powerful skill is the ability to see our own contribution to the unwelcome behavior we see around us. Why is self-awareness more powerful than judging others? Because altering my own behavior is the best access I have to altering the future.
I know this. I teach this. I also forget to practice it.
In November of 2007, for example, I was in San Diego attending a weekend training for coaches. A breakout session was led by the author of one of the best-known books on coaching. It is a good book and I was very eager to attend. His ninety minute workshop was scheduled six times over two days–I was in a morning session on day two.
The author immediately struck me as irritated, aggressive, and arrogant. (Here I am, always ranking and sorting.) His opening seemed vague and rambling and his responses to questions were not pertinent. (Here I go, proceeding to collect evidence for my case.) People were shaking their heads and looking at each other. Coaches are a fairly supportive audience but in the first fifteen minutes, five of the thirty people walked out, one while the author was responding (elliptically) to his question! (Perfect. I have other people agreeing with me, a seductive substitute for truth.) I decided to (more…)
Wharton Professor Jonah Berger talks about his book, Contagious: Why Things Catch On. The book details six key steps to drive people to talk and share. STEPPS is an acronym for:
Social currency:, It’s all about people talking about things to make themselves look good, rather than bad
Triggers: which is all about the idea of “top of mind, tip of tongue.” We talk about things that are on the top of our heads.
Emotion: When we care, we share. The more we care about a piece of information or the more we’re feeling physiologically aroused, the more likely we pass something on.
Public: When we can see other people doing something, we’re more likely to imitate it.
Practical value: Basically, it’s the idea of news you can use. We share information to help others, to make them better off.
Stories: how we share things that are often wrapped up in stories or narratives.
You are welcome to use all this in your work and to pass any of my posts along to your colleagues. I only ask that you preserve the attribution to me and not alter the content.
To contact me by telephone or email, click here for the “About Tony Mayo” page.
A video that answers the most common questions asked by prospective clients is also available here..
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You can read what some of my clients have said about my coaching by clicking here for “Client Comments.”
What a wonderful power the machine gives you but, is it going to dominate you? The statement of what the need and want is must come from you not from the machine. Not from the government that’s teaching you or not even from the clergy, it has to come from one’s own inside and the minute that you let that drop and take what the dictation (dictator) of the time is instead of the dictation of your own eternity is you have capitulated to the devil and you are in hell.
The point is this: the one who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and the one who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully.
Each of you must give as you have made up your mind, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.
And God is able to provide you with every blessing in abundance, so that by always having enough of everything, you may share abundantly in every good work.
The principles of meeting facilitation, as delineated three centuries ago.
…a mutual deference is affected; contempt of others disguised; authority concealed; attention given to each in his turn; and an easy stream of conversation maintained, without vehemence, without interruption, without eagerness for victory, and without any airs of superiority. These attentions and regards are immediately agreeable to others, abstracted from any consideration of utility or beneficial tendencies: they conciliate affection, promote esteem, and extremely enhance the merit of the person who regulates his behaviour by them.
–David Hume 1711-1776
An Enquiry Concerning the Principles of Morals
Section VIII Of Qualities Immediately Agreeable To Others.
Paradoxically, to survive depression you have to give yourself over to it. You have to embrace the darkness, or enter into the darkness, or let yourself become the darkness, and try not to judge yourself for it.
You also have to try as much as possible to honor whatever small signs of progress might come as you work your way through that darkness, or as it works its way through you.
The Motley Fool: As you well know, Costco has taken some heat on Wall Street for being overly generous to its employees. According to a recent New York Times story, Costco store workers earn an average of around $17 an hour, which is 42% more than employees at Sam’s Club, which is owned by Wal-Mart. You have said Costco’s pay structure makes for good business. Explain.
Costco co-founder & CEO Jim Sinegal: Well, first of all, we have a very low turnover in our company. Our turnover is something in the 20% range, and that is including a lot of seasonal hires that we have both in the summer and at Christmas. After employees have been with us for more than a year, that turnover rate goes below 6%, so we take great pride in the fact that people join us and they stay with us. Our attitude has always been that if you hire good people and provide good wages and good jobs and more than that — if you provide careers — that good things will happen to your company. I think we can say that that has been proved by the quality of people that we have and how they have built our organization.
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Bad presentation–or resistant audience?
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