True Heroism
True heroism is remarkably sober, very undramatic. It is not the urge to surpass others at whatever cost, but the urge to serve others at whatever cost.
—Arthur Ashe
1943-1993
Tennis champion
A Stuntman’s Secret Fear
Dar and I were childhood friends who met at a trampoline school.
One day we climbed a ladder up to a billboard, high above the roof of the school, and dove off, landing on a soft pad below. I climbed to the fifth rung; Dar just kept climbing. Ten years later, he was one of the most daring and successful stuntmen of modern times.
For one of his stunts, Dar had to run full tilt forward, spin around backward, crash through a glass window, fall sixteen stories, and then do a somersault with a half twist, before dropping into an airbag. Any miscalculation or mistake would have cost him his life.
Dar’s stunts included diving off the top of the Capitol Records building in Los Angeles, leaping from a helicopter hovering at three hundred feet to land in an airbag (that looked the size of a postage stamp below), and driving a car off the rim of (more…)
Improve Management by Exposing Paradigms
For a social discipline, such as management, the assumptions are actually a good deal more important than are the paradigms for a natural science. The paradigm—that is, the prevailing general theory—has no impact on the natural universe. Whether the paradigm states that the sun rotates around the earth, or that, on the contrary, the earth rotates around the sun, has no effect on sun and earth. But a social discipline, such as management, deals with the behavior of people and human institutions. The social universe has no “natural laws” as the physical sciences do. It is thus subject to continuous change. This means that assumptions that were valid yesterday can become invalid and, indeed, totally misleading in no time at all.
Because the generally held assumptions about management no longer apply, it is important that we first make them explicit, and then replace them with assumptions that better fit today’s reality.
That’s where we are today with the discipline of management.
—Peter Drucker
Forbes, 1998
Great accomplishments require hope, love, & forgiveness
Nothing that is worth doing can be achieved in our lifetime; therefore, we must be saved by hope. … Nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone; therefore, we are saved by love. No virtuous act is quite as virtuous from the standpoint of our friend or foe as it is from our standpoint. Therefore, we must be saved by the final form of love, which is forgiveness.
–Reinhold Niebuhr
The Irony of American History
Page 63
Twitter Log XXIII
I use Twitter to share brief messages, not more than two per day. You can have them delivered to your cell phone by text message (SMS) or view them when you visit your free Twitter web page. Create a Twitter account and “follow” TonyMayo.
Here are my recent tweets (messages):
There is no greater obstacle to freedom than the assumption that it has already been attained.
What prison could be more secure than one we’re convinced is “the world,” where the boundaries of action and thought are assumed to be limited by the permissible rather than the possible?
Democratic society, as we know it, is the ultimate prison, because who’s going to try to escape from a situation of apparent freedom? —David Edwards
Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt. –Wm. Shakespeare Measure for Measure
Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate. –Carl Jung
When tempted to compete & conquer, look to cooperate & create. –Tony Mayo
Prior tweets are here, at Twitter Logs.
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©2011 Tony Mayo
Peace and Acceptance
Living apart and at peace with myself, I came to realize more vividly the meaning of the doctrine of acceptance.To refrain from giving advice, to refrain from meddling in the affairs of others, to refrain, even though the motives be the highest, from tampering with another’s way of life – so simple, yet so difficult for an active spirit.
Hands off!
— Henry Miller
Embrace All of Your Selves
It Comes Down to This
When you are visited by your personal demons – your fears, anxieties, doubts and wounds – can you sit down and have tea with them?
Can you turn your attention toward the demons and explore what you can learn about yourself?
For many reasons, we often can’t. But the intention to investigate that which is between you and feeling free can sometimes result in new possibilities where none previously existed.
The acronym RAIN can be helpful.
R = Recognize or Realize what is happening
A = Accept or Allow your experience to be what it is
I = Investigate or be Intimate with what is here
N = When we can do the above, you may begin to experience a degree of
Non-attachment, Non-judging and Natural awareness
As I mentioned, sometimes we can’t shift unpleasant sensations, emotions or mental conditions easily or quickly. Over time, with patience, consistency and presence, we begin to feel more confidence that we can be with whatever arises.
See free, easy Meditation Instructions on this blog.
All the World’s a Stage
If you are an actor in your own private movie, so is everyone you encounter. You may be the star of your movie but just an extra in theirs.
Try to appreciate some of their drama before you act out yours.
–Tony Mayo
Samurai CFO
Years ago, while I was establishing myself in a new executive coaching practice, I supported my family by working as a part-time, outsourced CFO. Here is a reminiscence of a deep learning I earned during one of those accounting gigs.
I sought help from my own executive coach with the very difficult behavior of a bookkeeper employed by my client. She had called several urgent meetings with the partners and each time threatened to quit, more or less because of me. These meetings were very exasperating as she made charges that were either too vague to dispute or clearly contrary to plain facts. For example, although we repeatedly assured her that she had her job as long as she wanted it she insisted she could not continue to work under such uncertainty and would resign immediately because we were conspiring to take her job away. The partners felt obligated to placate and mollify her because she was the only bookkeeper out of several they had tried who was able to make any progress in getting their bills out to clients.
I said to my executive coach, “I am stressed and bothered because of her unpredictable behavior, of course, but I am mostly bothered by the fact that it bothers me. I am so ‘trained’ and ‘transformed’ I ought to be able to deal with her behavior without becoming stressed, hurt, or angry. I try to remain calm, not react to her outbursts, and keep on working because I need this income. I do what is necessary just to keep getting paid, so why do I lose sleep and spend my non-billable time talking about her with my coach, family, and friends?”
By the way, is this scenario reminding you of anything in your life, right now?
My coach reminded me of the dangers of attachment, of identifying with our property or positions. We confuse preferred outcomes with necessary results. We grasp so avidly to particular bits of property or actions by others that we forget we can still be ourselves without them. We attach money or prestige to ourselves so firmly that we forget that we are not our results or our reputations. What I want is not what I am.
I then remembered the old samurai expression (I suppose all samurai expressions are now old).
The most effective warrior dies before entering the battle.
The bookkeeper was not damaging my body or physically invading my free time. My attachments were the only things making my life difficult. I was attached to looking good in the eyes of my client, I was attached to (more…)
The Invitation by Oriah Mountain Dreamer
It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living.
I want to know what you ache for,
and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing.
It doesn’t interest me how old you are.
I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love,
for your dreams, for the adventure of being alive.
It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon.
I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow,
if you have been opened by life’s betrayals or
have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain!
I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own,
without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it.
I want to know if (more…)
Stress Accelerates Aging. Exercise & Meditation Help.
Professor Elizabeth Blackburn is the discoverer of telomeres, tiny units of DNA at the ends of chromosomes that protect and stabilize our genetic blueprints. Telomeres seem to act as a biological clock that limits the lifespan of cells–and of ourselves.
… psychological stress actually ages cells, which can be seen when you measure the wearing down of the tips of the chromosomes, those telomeres. … We looked at the measures for cardiovascular disease — bad lipid profiles, obesity, all that stuff. The women with those had low telomerase. … Researchers have found that the brain definitely sends nerves directly to organs of the immune system and not just to the heart and the lower gut.
A CONVERSATION WITH ELIZABETH H. BLACKBURN
Finding Clues to Aging in the Fraying Tips of Chromosomes
New York Times
July 3, 2007
… mindfulness meditation techniques appear to shift cognitive appraisals from threat to challenge, decrease ruminative thought, and reduce stress arousal. Mindfulness may also directly increase positive arousal states. … meditation may have salutary effects on telomere length by reducing cognitive stress and stress arousal and increasing positive states of mind and hormonal factors that may promote telomere maintenance.
Can meditation slow rate of cellular aging?
Cognitive stress, mindfulness, and telomeres.
Epel, Daubenmier, Moskowitz, Folkman, & Blackburn
University of California San Francisco
Department of Psychiatry August, 2009
The findings also suggest that exercise may prevent this damage. ,,, Among those who exercised, perceived stress was unrelated to telomere length.
Exercise May Prevent Impact of Stress on Telomeres, A Measure of Cell Health
UCSF News
April 4, 2011
See free, easy Meditation Instructions on this blog.
Twitter Log XXII
I use Twitter to share brief messages, not more than two per day. You can have them delivered to your cell phone by text message (SMS) or view them when you visit your free Twitter web page. Create a Twitter account and “follow” TonyMayo.
Here are my recent tweets (messages):
Inside, I’ve got to feel I’m the best, but if I tell you I’m the best, then I’m a fool.
–Bubba Smith RIP
Responsibility’s daunting allure: Most duly claim to want it but few want to fully claim it.
—Tony Mayo
Ignorance is preferable to error; and he is less remote from the truth who believes nothing, then he who believes what is wrong.
–Thomas Jefferson Notes on the State of Virginia page 49
Medal of Honor winner, “most powerful force in the world is not hatred for the enemy but love for the man next to you.” Click here to see story on this blog.
It’s like a deal you can make with the universe: I’ll give up greed for freedom. Then you can start putting your time to good use.
Progress is not made by finding the ‘right answers,’ but by asking meaningful questions.
–Winograd & Flores P. 13 Understanding Computers and Cognition: A New Foundation for Design
To sell don’t just show: involve. Video here
We’re none of us perfect, so I’ve found more use for the apology than the pillory.
–Tony Mayo
Career Insanity: do same thing over and over expecting same result. You must get better just to stay even. See the video here.
Innovation Cycle: obscurity, ridicule, argument, victory.
–TonyMayo
Prior tweets are here, at Twitter Logs.
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©2011 Tony Mayo
Real Progress
Philosophical endeavors turn in a constant circle, arriving again at a point where they have already been. Thereupon materials now lying in the dust can perhaps be processed into a magnificent structure.
–Immanuel Kant, 1781
Critique of Pure Reason
Progress exists only in the realm of what is ultimately unimportant for human existence. Philosophy does not evolve in the sense of progress. Rather, philosophy is an attempt at developing and clarifying the same few problems; philosophy is the independent, free, and thoroughgoing struggle of human existence with the darkness that can break out at any time in that existence. And every clarification opens new abysses.
–Martin Heidegger, 1927
Phenomenological Interpretation of
Kant’s Critique of Pure Reason
Ultimately we are seeking a better understanding of what it means to be human. In this quest, progress is not made by finding the ‘right answers,’ but by asking meaningful questions — ones that evoke an openness to new ways of being.
–Terry Winograd & Fernando Flores, 1986
Understanding Computers and Cognition:
A New Foundation for Design
Page 13
Video: Story to Illustrate Sales Technique
A quick story to illustrate an old maxim: Tell them and create doubt, show them and cause belief, but involve them to change behavior.
Genuine Success: Vitality, Service, & Outstanding Performance
A small group of leaders in the DC Metro area is interviewing potential new members for their coaching group. Details below or you can download a brochure here: http://tiny.cc/gsvsop
Your organization and your responsibilities can grow only as fast as you do. Participate in Genuine Success: Vitality, Service, and Outstanding Performance (GS:VSOP) to develop your expertise in the only career strategy that is endlessly scalable. Leadership: the ability to get things done with and through other people.
GS:VSOP is a continuing program to provide business people with structure, tools, and support to produce nonlinear, unpredicted, massive results at work while enjoying a high level of personal satisfaction, fulfillment, and vitality.
GS:VSOP’s unique mix of traditional business principles, cutting-edge brain science, powerful one-to-one coaching, and ancient disciplines assures you a productive and profitable experience.
Each month, you will grow as a leader through a full day of group learning with other successful leaders; participate in one-to-one coaching sessions with your group leader; be held accountable for implementing your vision with follow-up sessions and field practice.
Program topics include influence and persuasion, organization and planning, finance, self-management and growth, focus and concentration, integrity, communication, health, and fitness. See brochure for more details.
This program is for leaders who:
- Aim to achieve transformational growth & breakthrough results.
- Want to improve ROI & speed growth.
- Are frustrated with “business as usual” & just know “there’s got to be a better way.”
- Are ready to get more done with less stress.
- Apply their knowledge to innovate & make things happen.
- Strive for a greater clarity & confidence.
- Are ready to take bolder action, to employ their talents & resources thoroughly.
You’ll learn why you behave the way you do and how to alter your conversations for greater performance and how to consistently achieve significant measurable organization-wide improvements.
Schedule a conversation with Tony Mayo to find out if this program is right for you by clicking here.
To me, leadership is a journey toward wholeness.
A leader’s journey starts by looking inward to understand, “Why am I here?” and “What is it that I’m here to do?”
–- Joe Jaworski, MIT
Society for Organizational Learning
Genuine Success:
Vitality, Service, & Outstanding Performance
A Program for Leaders
Committed to Workplaces of
Humanity & Prosperity
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